Willimina, Amani


Amani seeks Willimina out for a talk.


-- On Pern --
It is 6:12 PM where you are.
It is evening of the first day of the second month of the thirteenth turn of the 12th pass.
In Igen:
It is the thirty-first day of Winter and 34 degrees. It is a bright, sunny day.
In Southern:
It is the thirty-first day of Summer and 99 degrees. It is sunny and bright. The skies are clear.
In Southern Mountains:
It is the thirty-first day of Summer and 21 degrees. It's really damn cold out.


Caravan Grounds, Zingari Encampment, Zingari Leader's Wagon; Igen Weyr

OOC Date 28 Jan 2018 07:00


willimina_default.jpg amani_default.jpg

"The Hanged Man and The Eight of Stars."


Zingari Leader's Wagon

Lovingly carved by Ephraim's hand for the start of his and Willimina's young family, it has withstood the test of time well. The large double wide is still as sturdy as it had been over a decade ago. It's the one thing besides their wedding rings Willimina has kept, though it's used more for business now than family living and this shows now in the way it's been redecorated. Where once a large bed sat, closets have been built to host Willimina's dresses and dance wear. Shelves underneath the hanging dresses contain the matching sandles. A couple of cubbies have been built to host the trunks that hold her jewelry and other accouterments. The cradle Ephraim had wrought so long ago for Lillia sits here too, awaiting a new baby and will be moved to the yurt when needed. Where children's bunks used to be, Willimina's desk now resides, neatly stacked with hides and other things. Under her ceiling cupboards, shelves have been built to host dossiers and hidework and other such things. Other things are stowed here too, things the family doesn't have room or need for in the yurt, though all neatly organized so that Willa's 'office' remains show able to the public.

Amani's visits to Igen are a rarer thing these days than they once were, owing to the fact that she is now only one of two goldriders at Southern. Still, she makes time, and has spent much of the afternoon following her greetings to Diem and Nasrin chatting with merchants in the Bazaar. She does, of course, mean to track down Xanthee and Reveka, but with the former being at work and the latter not run across as of yet, the young goldrider makes her way to the Zingari camp in search of another conversation she's wanting to have. Still in her leathers against the cold, enters the rings of wagons with a parcel tucked under her arm, knocking on the door to Willimina's wagon once she's reached it.

Amani is lucky that Willimina is in, since so much more time is sent in the larger yurt these days. The fledgling Weyrwoman is greeted with a smile once Willimina sees who it is. Willimina steps out and hugs Amani, tossing formalities to the wind for the sake of 'family'. "Amani! I wasn't expecting you'd be in Igen for awhile yet, what with Southern's recent gold loss. Come in, come in, would you like some tea? Whiskey?" Willimina shoos Amani inside where a heating brazier has kept things niiiice and warm. Looks like Willimina had been cleaning up for the day, things half stowed.

Amani returns Willimina's hug warmly, grinning as she looks the caravan leader over. "Some tea would do nicely," the young goldrider says as she steps inside, and lets the parcel she carries down from beneath her arm into her hands. "I'd heard you were expecting again and wanted to give you this." It's a blanket made from a whole feline fur, the edges trimmed in a native pattern of the softest wool yarn in green, black, and violet. "It was made by one of the wildling clans living near the Weyr," she says. "And it is harder for me to get here, true enough, but it's been awhile enough." Considering it's been a few months since Bailey's demise now.

Willimina settles into making tea and is midway to putting the kettle on the brazier when Amani ofers up her gift. Willimina finishes setting the kettle down and moves to accept with a smile on her lips. "Why thank you Amani, this is very kind." Willimina is definitely showing more and sooner his pregnancy, a bump already prominant, and she's only just barely a third of the way. She opens the parcel a bit to feel the blanket, smiling at it's softness. She nods at Amani's next. "Aye, but I figured they'd be safeguarding their remaining golds until another is born or transferred in." Willimina isn't all that blind to weyr politics, but obviously Southern feels secure. Willimina doesn't press the subject, just checks on the tea, setting the blanket in the bag she totoes from yurt to wagon every day. "So What's on your mind Amani?"

"They are safeguarding them. But I'll be damned if I'm going to be treated like some delicate flower, and I know Mayte feels the same." She's sure Willimina must remember Mayte and won't be surprised. Amani doesn't sit just yet, distracted by trying to get her thoughts in order. There are a few things on her mind, but figuring out which to address first hasn't been easy. "Might be easier to ask me what isn't," the young goldrider says ruefully, smirking as she watches the caravan leader move about the wagon. "Well, the first thing has to do with Zymuraith, actually. When she speaks to me, what's in her mind is…very complex. She has me figuring out a lot of things, telling me it's good to keep expanding my imagination. But there's something she's been showing me more often lately, and she has me trying to decipher what I see and I don't always succeed." She's been fidgeting a bit and turns over her hands, fingers linked so that she stops. "They're cards. Like the ones you use for fortunes. I was wondering if you could help me understand some of them."

As patient as ever, Willimina listens to Amani speak, moving about as she does. She grabs tea cups and sweetener and sets them on the countertop and then moves to check the kettle. Not yet. Pulling two tea sachets from the cupbaords, she drops them in the cups and looks thoughtful for a moment. "Cards you say?" Willimina's interest is perked. But she waits until the kettle sings before she speaks again. She pours the water on the sachets and leaves it to steep before moving to pull a deck of well worn cards from their spot on the shelves. Willimina waves at her desk, which has her chair and one to the side, and the surface is empty for once. "Do go on…"

Amani moves over to the desk and sits in the chair to the side, unfastening her jacket and draping it over the back as the warmth of the brazier-warmed wagon seeps in. "Sometimes it's easier to figure them out than others. The night that…that Bailey went, Zymuraith dropped one into my dreams just before the keening started. It was like a warning - the Death card; I remember hearing that's part of the deck. But more recently she showed me two - a man at an anvil holding a plate with a five-pointed star, intricately made. Beautiful. And there were other plates hanging on the wall around him with other stars, all simpler than the one he was holding. Seven of them. The other one was a man hanging upside-down from a tree by his foot, his face shining like a star." There's perplexity in her expression as she describes them, her gaze vague and far-off as she tries to remember as much as she can. "Zymuraith says I need to be what they are, but…I haven't figured them out yet. I can't tell who's more frustrated about it, me or her."

Willimina listens carefully, nodding when Amani eplains the death card appearing in her dreams. "While it sounds accurate, your dragon could have been warning you more about change than the death of the other queen, though she could have been hinting at both. The death card is not always a harbinger of doom." She nods along yet again as Amani begins explaining the other cards. "Eight of Stars and the Hanged Man." She names the cards immediately and pulls them from her deck with a practiced hand, each depicting just what Amani had described.

"The hanged man, a symbol of spiritual growth, and planning. He represents the need to grow and learn, but, with the knowledge that one must keep his or her own council at times. The Hanged Man can sometimes reflect that you are feeling stuck or restricted in your life. You need to get in touch with why you are feeling this way, and work to release yourself from these restrictions. In this way, the Hanged Man is also about letting go. You need an emotional release from whatever it is that is leaving you feeling stuck. Accept and surrender to your present circumstances. You may need to become more vulnerable and open to different experiences but this will help you end the struggle and give up your need for control. It is when you can really let go of all the worries and concerns that you have, that you find these concerns suddenly disappear and a new reality is possible. He too is a symbol of change, specifically the need to break old habits and form new ones, and he represents sacrifice to the greater good."

WIllimina turns the card towards Amani before tapping on the seven of stars. "And this….shows that you have a strong desire to invest in those things that will provide long-term benefit. You understand the value of putting in time and energy now for longer-term rewards, and you are not necessarily looking for 'quick wins' as such. It indicates that if you have been working extra hard or putting in extra effort into something, it will finally pay off. Your effort will definitely be worth it and you will see the results and rewards for your labour. You may have been working on something quite challenging and important for the last few months, perhaps it will come to fruition."

"Well, there certainly was both," Amani notes ruefully after Willimina's first, and then watches with interest as the other woman names and produces the very cards she just described. There's something almost eerie about seeing them physically, and while she wonders for the dozenth time just how her lifemate could hold such things in her draconic mind, she knows the answer isn't likely to ever be clear. Dark eyes fall upon the Hanged Man, studying as intently as her ears listen. It's easy to nod along with what Willimina says of this particular card, much of it making sense and giving her points to remember…but it's the possibility that it could mean a sticking point for her that makes Amani most pensive. When Willa turns the card toward her, she draws it closer with a fingertip, a sort of connection felt with the possibilities it represents. But then her attention turns to the Eight of Stars, and there is still more that rings true.

"Try everything," Amani affirms drolly at the caravan leader's last, and she sits up straighter with a sigh, a dark brow quirking curiously. "But how do you get all of that out of the pictures on these cards, Willimina? What means what, and how do I know? Sometimes I have this…feeling in my gut about what certain things I see might mean, and it turns out right. Other times, I'm just way off the mark or stuck… Is it just a matter of practice?" Faranth, it would be so much easier if Zymuraith would just tell her things, but no. Intuition is something to be labored at, apparently!

Willimina leans back in her chair, shuffling the tarot cards idly in her hands, the movement comfortable and easy, speaking to turns of practice. "Zingari women, particularly those who show an apptitude for these sort of things, are taught the meaning of the cards from the time we learn to speak and understand. Each card has a meaning, or three, depending on where it might pop up in a reading, or which formation you read it from, and those feelings you get? Hold on to those child, because that's your gut telling you, and your gut will always be right. Listen to it. And That may be what your illustrious beauty of a dragon might be trying to tell you. And yes, practice…and learning. You should seek a deck, and I can map out what the cards mean for you, the basics at least."

Amani can't help but watch the way Willimina handles those cards, her eyes lifting to the caravan leader's face only when she starts speaking again. The fact that there could be multiple meanings is a bit vexing, but considering her lifemate, unsurprising. "So trust my gut, trust my dragon, my dragon could be my gut…" She gives a rueful little shake of her head. "Zymuraith is always telling me I need to work on opening my mind further, and the older she gets, the more intricate her mind becomes…the more I see the truth of it." With a sigh, she asks, "So I should learn the cards outside of her mind… Would I find a deck somewhere here, maybe?"

"Exactly that." Willimina confirms, the cards still shifting in her hands. "There are those amongst us that will provide one for a price. Check our vendors…." Willimina looks thoughtful for a moment. "I believe Haddick sells them. And there are a few amongst the Armida. Mine were a hand-me-down from my grandmother." With ease, Willimina rejoins the stars and hanged man to the deck, shuffling and shifting, long fingers holding the cards with a delicate reverence.

"I'll look before I go," Amani promises, sitting back in her chair, and giving another soft sigh. A beat of quiet thought passes before she makes a soft sound of amusement. "There's another card she likes to…tease me with lately, for lack of how else to put it. The Lovers." She flushes lightly as she casts a sidelong smirk at Willimina. "She says it's because I'm still confused about it even when I think the meaning is obvious. But she's right. And it leads me to something else I wanted to ask." The goldrider tucks a bit of stray hair back behind her ear, crossing her ankles as she stretches her legs out. "Willimina…how did you know that you loved Tallel? What made it so different from anything else?" It might be a bold question, but such things have never bothered Amani much when her desire to know something is strong. At least she doesn't feel as though Willimina is going to rebuke her for it.

Willimina smiles when Amani mentions the lovers, the card apearing from the deck to land on the table in a few swift movements. A subtle tease about her dragon teasing her. But now it's time for Willimina to slip into a quiet beat of thought, her hands shuffling away at that deck. During this quiet period, a look of soft reminiscence falls on her face. She laughs, a sound that comes off more like a girlish giggle. "Y'know, we weren't even supposed to be. He came to my Caravan to answer a call for help. My husband had been murdured, and I'd lost half my caravan to plague and other sickness, almost lost my oldest daughter. He came as a healer, with his aunt and they saved my clan."

The Leader blushes and looks thoughtful again. "It would take a very long time to tell our story, and there were many things that led to my loving Tallel, but I think what truly made me realise I loved him, was when I realised that when I woke in the morning, my first thoughts were of him, and I lost my breath whenever he was near, and when I realised his tawny eyes were twin suns I could drown in forever and when we were told marry or part, I couldn't stand the thought of losing him. But it sneaks up on you, love does, and it catches you unawares and sweeps you off your feet. What makes it different is that when I look at Tallel….When I look at my husband the whole world disappears, as if nothing else ever existed but he and I, that turns later my heart still trips over itself at the sight of him, and my day rises and sets with him, and our children. I love and need him as much now as I ever did then. He is that other piece of myself I didn't know I was missing until he came into my life. That's what makes it different."

Willimina is passionate on this, and her face practically glows with the love she feels and has for her husband. Her hand hoovers over the swell of her belly and a soft smile touches her face. "And I would populate the world in his likeness if I could." Willimina looks at Amani then, her eyes soft and her lips smiling. "Love is a long, confusing and wonderful road Amani, and the only way to truly know if you are in it, is to take the leap and have some faith that life will lead you where you are meant to be, in both love and responsibility. You can handle whatever obsticles and doubts lie in your path Amani, just trust your Zymuraith and trust your gut, and don't be afraid to take a risky leap now and again."

So much to think about! Amani knew that broaching the topic of love would be a deep matter, especially considering how she'd seen Willimina and Tallel look at each other sometimes. But the passion with which Willa speaks of it is enough to have Amani's eyes glossing over with tears and smiling at the same time in sympathetic reflex. "I've always been one to take leaps. Calculated ones, but leaps nonetheless," the young goldrider says, chuckling a little and clearing her throat. Was there actually a lump starting to form there? "It sounds so wonderful. And frightening. I want to know what that's like…and there's someone, but I'm afraid I won't be able to know what it's like the same way. I wouldn't want him out of my life, but when I lie down and when I wake…it's Zymuraith I think of, not him. I feel like…it will never be fair, trying to know that sort of love with a man when she is so literally the other half of my heart." The fact that she's troubled is plain in the frown she wears when she looks to Willimina now. "Maybe that's something dragonriders can never fully know once they Impress. But still…" Another beat of quiet contemplation passes. "I don't expect you to know the answer Willimina, but…you make it sound like that sort of love might be able to find its way even when things look or feel impossible."

Willimina looks at Amani as a mother would look at her child while they try and work out a problem. Willimina will never know the enormity of what it is to impress a dragon, but she knows about splitting love in different directions. She still loves her first husband, will always love him and yet, she loves Tallel with every fiber of her being. And She loves her children with the same fierce intensity, loving each as fully and truly as the next. She waits for it to click as Amani literally spells out what's going on in her mind. "Amani dear. Listen to me. I know that dragonriders can love as deeply and fully as my husband and I love each other, I've seen it. And while I may not be mentally bound to a beast as intelligent as you or I, I know a thing about loving in different ways and in different directions. I am a widow, a wife, a mother a cousin and a leader. Love doesn't come in finite amounts, to be doled out sparingly, no my dear, it floods through you, so thick and endless that you feel you might nearly drown in it. It dosn't lessen the further it's spread, it grows and takes wing and is as full and wonderful from one to the next. You will not love your dragon less for loving a man, and in the other palm, you will not love you rman less for your loving your dragon. There's a reason they call love unconditional." Willimina wonders at something, since she's seen a couple of riders go through this very conundrum. "If he loves you, and accepts you for who you are, he will not judge you for or hold a grudge about flights, he will simply, understand….if that is something that worries you.

Amani keeps her eyes locked to Willimina as the other woman implores her to listen. Perhaps the caravan leader does know the answer simply by virtue of being in love herself. It certainly sounds that way, given the conviction with which she speaks. It's in the realizing just how much she hasn't known of love or been allowed to learn of it that tears end up finding her, and she seems confused or frustrated by them when they escape. "Unconditional," she echoes, sniffing back the further tears that linger in the backdrop. "And no boundaries. I'll…need to remember that." She nods to the other woman's last. "We already talked about that. I just decided that it's not something we'll know how to really feel about until it finally happens." Slender shoulders shrug, a corner of her mouth quirking upward resignedly. "Is the tea ready, do you think?" she ventures, amusement slipping in as she realizes they've been talking this entire time and leaving it forgotten.

Willimina had completely forgotten about the tea. She looks over to it now and the cups are still happily steaming. She stands and brings them over before fetching the sweetener as well. "Do forgive me for forgetting dear, here you go." She sits and adds sweetener to her own tea before sipping at it. She sighs and looks at the young Weyrwoman with some affection and confidence. "Well, whatever happens dear, I am confident you can handle with with grace and a level head. And as for the rest, let the ieces fall where they may, we can't control everything in our lives. Somethings you have to just let happen, as you said, some things you cant know until a situation arises."

"It's alright," Amani assures Willimina about the tea with a chuckle, going about the process of sweetening her own cup. As for how she'll handle things… "I'll do my best. It's all I can do. And I'll try to get more comfortable with just letting things happen." It seems to her that her best chance of experiencing all that love has to offer is to just let it happen, after all. "So I hear there's a wedding coming…" Chatting over that is something she'll do quite happily with tea in hand now. Eventually it will get finished and the young weyrwoman will depart with copious thanks for the caravan leader before going in search of Xanthee and Reveka. Making their way home will be an affair left for after moonrise.

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