Who

Kyriatis, Amani

What

Candidate and goldrider converse in the Galleries on a rainy morning.

When

It is midmorning of the nineteenth day of the third month of the fourteenth turn of the 12th pass.

Where

Galleries, Southern Weyr

OOC Date 13 Jun 2018 06:00

 

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"What would happen if she really objected to someone?"


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Galleries

Stone benches rise up.. and up.. and up: grooves upon grooves show marks of their hand-hewn origins, small chips and uneven textures to tell the tale of humble beginnings in a place which looks upon the black-and-white Sands of Southern, a place of greater beginnings indeed. The Galleries take up roughly a third of the perimeter of the Sands: to the west are flat, staggered entranceways, ledges for dragons interested in watching the proceedings. Below and just easterly, a stitched-hide curtain covers the entrance to the bowl, keeping the wind away from the precious cargo often housed upon the Sands. It cannot help the shrieking of the wind above: though it is muted in this hollow, the intermittent sighs and moans of the thermals shrieking through the viewing-ledges above can be unsettling.


Mid-morning finds Southern hard at work, though it's a day best suited for those with indoor tasks: the rain has been falling steadily since before dawn, and shows little sign of relenting. The autumnal chill has drawn more than one person towards the hatching grounds, where in lieu of rain there's pure humidity; a trade-off that some, it seem, find worthwhile. A few rows back in the galleries, Kyriatis sits with one leg tucked beneath her, the other propped up upon the tier of seats below. Not that she's without industry: there's a stack of socks beside her, and one currently in hand, two over-large holes being proficiently (if not beautifully) darned. The mending takes perhaps half her attention, the rest drawn, inexorably, towards those thirty-five eggs.

The Hatching Cavern is certainly a popular spot during the rain, and for Amani, it's no exception. Of course, with Zymuraith wanting the goldrider near as much as possible and said goldrider not often feeling inclined to argue, it's a popular spot for her anyway. Candidates are becoming a much more popular sight in the Galleries, and it doesn't take Amani long to spot another with her obvious white knot and a basketful of socks. Now there's an onerous-looking chore. "I hope they didn't give you a basket of singles," the junior Weyrwoman notes with a smirk. "Or worse yet, make you go find all the matches if they are singles."

"Junior Weyrwoman," says Kyriatis, hastily, dropping the sock currently mid-mend as she hastily snaps a salute. It's clear that although she's had some practice with the art of the salute, it's not an altogether comfortable motion just yet— and perhaps that's made more clear by the somewhat awkward look upon her face, and the quick flush of pink about her cheeks. She ducks to reclaim the sock before it disappears forever, and adds, on the way back up, "In theory they all have pairs. I'm not sure I care to look too closely, though… It was discovered that I can darn, and that's fine, but I definitely can't knit replacements, and I don't think I want to learn, either."

However awkward Kyriatis' salute may be, it's enough for Amani, who returns a practiced one herself and motions for the younger girl not to worry too much, smirking gently for the bit of blushing. "I don't blame you," she agrees with a rueful chuckle. "Repairs are one thing. Making, on the other hand…" Not so much preferred. "You're Kyriatis, right?" she asks coming to sit near the socks and idly smoothing out her skirt once she's there. "Did I see you Standing for Rhiscorath's clutch, too?"

Kyriatis is surprised to have been recognised, that much is clear, but doesn't let that particular emotion linger upon her (oh-so-expressive) face. She confirms her identity with a steady dip of her chin, only a few moments late. "Yes, ma'am," she agrees. "On both counts. I'm hopeful that one of these eggs contains my dragon. Or— I think I am, at least. And if not, that's fine too." Mostly fine, or so her expression implies, given the way she gazes out over the eggs in question, cautious and wistful all at once.

Though the surprise on Kyriatis' face is fleeting, Amani catches it, giving a quick grin. "She makes sure I know," the goldrider points out with a tilt of her head toward her lifemate, who is currently curled neatly around her clutch and surveying those watching…and deliberately unnerving some of them for entertainment. "Not that I wouldn't make an effort anyway, but Zymuraith wants me to sit with each Candidate, too, at least once. She wants the measure of you all, she says. Which she mostly has to do through me, of course." No pressure! Kyriatis' last earns a slightly bemused look. "You 'think' you're hopeful, but it's fine if you're not hopeful?"

Again, surprise: this time, however, Kyriatis seems more thoughtful in it, and gives the surveying queen a considering glance before she says anything further. "It's fine if my dragon isn't in one of those eggs," she clarifies. "I mean, it has to be, doesn't it? It isn't a decision I get to make." Dark eyes slide back towards Amani, now, and give her a glance that holds at least a little appraisal within its consideration. "Is that common in a queen? That kind of interest in potential partners of her children, I mean. I've never spoken with the Weyrwoman, so I don't know about Rhiscorath."

Amani nods to Kyriatis' reply, dark brows lifting in comprehension as the Candidate explains. "That's very true. Though I think hoping, even knowing it might not happen, is a powerful thing. And it seems you've got the way of it down, else you wouldn't be sitting here fixing socks," she notes with another smirk, gesturing to the younger girls' darning. The question of whether or not Zymuraith's fascination is common earns an uncertain hum from the goldrider, who reaches up to tuck some hair back behind her ear as she looks out toward her dragon. "I'm honestly not sure, though I have a feeling they all must, in their way. Dhiammarath did, but…it was a sort of intense and quiet thing. Rhiscorath likes order to things, so I'm sure she likes to know that matches make sense. Zymuraith…" She chuckles a little, trying to figure out how to put it into words. "She likes balance, and she weighs hearts. This is my first time seeing this side of her, even though I've learned how much she cares about everyone and everything, in her way. With you all, it's even more focused."

"Powerful… yes, I suppose it is," allows Kyriatis. "But dangerous, too. I've been having to retrain myself to stop focusing on the fear of disappointment. Sitting here helps, this time. I didn't understand, last time. They're just eggs and they don't do anything. But now… now I keep seeing potential. Hope. And so much potential for disappointment." She swallows, thickly, gazing back out over the eggs. "That makes sense, about Zymuraith. And all of them, I suppose. You want the best for your children, even though you have to let them go and make their own decisions." She hesitates. "What would happen if she really objected to someone?"

"It's good you can see the positive and the negative about it. Too easy to get caught up in one or the other," Amani notes with a nod. "Perspective is a crucial thing. We can't get too enamored of a certain result when all we can control is the journey. Not that that's something most of us just know." A slightly sheepish duck of her head shows that she probably has had that come around to bite her at some point. Kyriatis' last gives the goldrider pause, a quiet moment taken to consult with her lifemate. Down on the Sands, Zymuraith swings her head fully in their direction with an amused rumble. "I guess I'll find out if she ever really objects!" Amani replies with a laugh. "I don't expect it'd be as vehement a reaction as when she senses a danger is near, like a feline in the jungle, but…she'd probably watch the person very closely, if I had to guess. She's good at allowing for the fact that people can become better if they want to, but I don't know that she'd have much patience for someone who walked out there acting entitled or like a bully or any such thing." Klah-dark eyes slide to the younger girl again. "No chance she'll object to you, by the way. She likes this conversation we've been having. She says you're thoughtful."

Yes, Kyriatis is plainly curious at the reasons behind that sheepish head duck, but she's also far too polite to question it… even if oh, yes, she would love to. "I'm trying to learn perspective," she agrees. "It's hard. Things keep getting overwhelming inside my head, and then all I can think about is… if I Impress I'm going to end up dying in fall or being horribly disfigured and I'll never get to do any of the other things I love ever again." She makes a face. "And you can't live like that, can you?" Though relieved, clearly, that she's not made a bad impression upon the queen, the teen makes a rueful face nonetheless. "'Thoughtful'. To my detriment, I think. Overthinking - that's what I do."

Amani shakes her head to Kyriatis' question, rhetorical though it may be. "You could also die with a wrong step out of bed in the morning," she points out. "If all we did was think about all the ways we might possibly die or get maimed, we'd never live. We might run a bit more of a risk as Threadfighters…well. More the bronzes and chromatics than us. But still, it's there, and we can either let it make us want to hide in our weyrs til the next Fall…or let it spur us on to live even more. Personally, I'd die regretful if I let the fear win. No way am I going to let it." Slender shoulders hitch upward in punctuation, and she gives the girl lopsided smile. "Better to overthink than under-think? Though I suppose there's an argument against that, too."

Thoughtfully, Kyriatis gives a slow nod. 'I— I suppose so. Yes. I just can't stop thinking about the fact that probably one of those eggs is going to hatch into a dragon that doesn't get to live to be a full turn old. Statistically. And then I can't stop." She sounds even younger than her sixteen turns when she says that, her fears writ large upon her face. "And that, right there, is the argument against overthinking, I think. I'm pretty sure I had more fun when I cared less. Does that make sense? Growing up sucks. There are so many things to think about and worry about and I'm not even dating, which would be a whole other thing altogether." A pause; an embarrassed pause. "I'm sorry. I talk too much."

"If it scares you so badly, why did you take up the knot again? In all that overthinking, there must be some part of you that gets around to reasoning why it's a good thing, otherwise you wouldn't have done it, I imagine." Genuine curiosity colors Amani's tone and expression, which sobers and shutters a bit when Kyriatis gives her verdict about what growing up is. "Yeah…it can," she agrees quietly, dropping her eyes for a moment and bringing them up again upon Zymuraith. "Candidacy does sort of take that last bit out of the picture," she notes wryly, regaining some of her humor. "We can always make sure you're in a…constant state of distraction, if you'd rather not think so much," is offered slyly.

Quietly, "Because I saw people standing right there Impress, and…" Kyriatis may not be able to put it into words, but it's there in her expression: she wanted it. She wants it. "But even then, I needed help to realise that. A friend talked me through it." She presses her lips together, turning her head to glance side-long at Amani. 'What, load me down with brain-intensive chores until I'm too busy and tired to think about anything at all?" She seems almost amused by it. No— //actually/ amused, the corners of her mouth twisting up. "I'm not saying that would be a bad thing. Things… get easier, right? As you grow up?"

Even if Kyriatis can't find the words for what she witnessed, Amani is certain she knows what the other girl is getting at. "More than any fear, any overwhelming rush of thoughts and worries…they're worth it. The sort of closeness you can never know with another person. Only with a dragon," she notes softly, and Zymuraith croons softly from the Sands in agreement. As for brain-intensive chores, "If I were to give Zymuraith free reign with you, I promise you'd be dead to the world right after dinner," she replies to the first question. To the second, she gives a somewhere-in-between tilt of her head. "Some things do. There's no easy answer when there are so many ways to grow up. For me, the part of me that wanted to survive and live on my own terms grew up before my heart did, and my heart is still going. For you…maybe the part of you that worries and thinks is growing up a little slower than the part of you that wants something more. On the whole, though, I think most things do get easier. It's life that never does."

Kyriatis' tiny little nod confirms Amani's explanation, and the wistful, hopeful expression that goes with it certainly backs up her desire to experience such a thing. "I do want that," she says. "Even if I don't know about the rest." Her mouth twists for the very idea of Zymuraith having free-reign: terrifying, and also, somehow, amusing in abstract. The rest, however, has her pausing, her nod, this time, rather slower and far less certain. "No," she says, on an exhale. "I suppose it never does. Do people just get better at pretending? Because that's actually kind of comforting, even if it means I have to think about all the really confident, capable people slightly differently."

"I expect some people are good pretenders. And others get better at just being honest and adapting, taking life as it comes. Accepting what they can't change and striving to improve what they can." Again Amani shrugs. "That's the ideal, anyway. I keep finding reasons why it's not that simple." The young goldrider rises then, brushing her skirt out straight. "I have to make a quick trip to the living cavern apparently," she says, rue edging her tone at the prospect of dodging raindrops right now. "Good luck with your socks, Kyriatis. And let me know if you need distracting at some point." Zymuraith has plenty of suggestions to pass on to willing Candidates!

Kyriatis' expression? Sympathetic. She still has a mountain of socks, despite the ones she's been working on throughout the conversation. No raindrops for her! "Thank you," she says, quietly genuine. "It's been… reassuring." Of a kind. "I will." But for now? Alas, the socks.

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